Above Photo: Inside the control room as the first Kraken telecast of the season gets underway.
“Everything’s so new for the new Kraken Hockey Network,” analyst Eddie Olczyk told viewers during the 2nd period of Sunday’s pre-season telecast against Calgary, “I don’t know who to blame.”
KHN Screengrab
Play-by-play man John Forslund shot back, “Oh, you’ll find out. There will be wrath, and you don’t want to be on the receiving end.”
The most reassuring aspect of KHN’s premiere broadcast, shown in Seattle on KONG-TV, is that Olczyk and Forslund’s entertaining banter hasn’t missed a beat from their two previous seasons together on the ROOT Sports regional cable network.
The same can’t yet be said for all parts of the telecast. An intended innovation, in-game conversation with new Kraken coach Dan Bylsma, didn’t come off as scheduled. The guess is that producers didn’t factor in that Byslma may have taken extra moments in the dressing room expressing displeasure with a 3-0 1st period deficit.
At right, a technician attempting to wire a microphone and earpiece to the coach, which delayed his return to the bench for the 2nd period. The crew never did make contact with Byslma – which, with the way the Kraken were playing, may have been the safer course to avoid angering the FCC.
Olczyk, always ready to lend a hand, surmised the coach’s microphone was merely lacking a power source. “Next time I’m at ‘Tarjay'” (a Target store, for those of you less refined), “I’ll get some double-D batteries.”
That would be quite the trick, because there’s no such thing as “Double-D’s,” at least when it comes to batteries. As Edzo said about an unrelated comment, “Another minus on Olczyk.” Forlund, extending the Target metaphor: “Cleanup on aisle six.”
Network Nitpicks
- The “KHN” on-screen logo (upper screen right) was a tad large, and the shots on goal counter (upper screen left), like the Grinch’s heart, was three sizes too small.
- Hey, it’s pre-season for the crew, too: a few of the visuals were either a beat late or a beat early (hey, I said these were nitpicks).
- Certainly not specific to KHN, but like all hockey TV intermissions, the commercial breaks were interminable – almost 11 minutes worth. Reporter Piper Shaw’s (photo at left) quality interviews and taped segments can easily get lost in the thick underbrush.
Kraken’s Best Lines Were From The Booth
Forslund: “There’s a rumor that we may room together (on the road).”
Olczyk: “Better be on the first floor, that’s all I’m telling you.”
Forslund: “Why would that be?”
Olczyk: “Because somebody’s going out the window.”
Forslund: “That’s very nice to say.”
Olczyk: “I love you, but that’s not happening.”
Forslund: “Why not? Let’s give it a shot.”
Olczyk: “It would be Oscar and Felix. That I know for sure.”
Dialog renowned Odd Couple playwright Neil Simon would have been proud of.
At this point, Brown, who normally stays below the fray from his perch between the benches, can’t help needling his partners. “What’s the over-under on you two living together? I put it at a week.”
Forslund: “We’re both adults. We could make a month.”
Olczyk: “I give it three days. I get the top bunk.”
Forslund: “I’ll be out in the hallway, because I’m not getting underneath that.”