We’re back in Boston now, with the championship game bearing down on us. After this week? It’s back to the Kraken.
But before that, let’s have a quick, entirely vibes-based for everyone except the US power rankings. Sound fun? Let’s do it.
1. Team USA – Rock, Flag & Eagle
The USA accidentally created the most politically charged hockey game in 40+ years, and then once again imparted an enormously rude awakening on their northern counterparts that in order to exact revenge on whatever insane thing our rapidly decaying government has decided it will fart out into the universe, they still have to overcome the fact that the US is the team to beat.
Team USA came out of the first two games shot out of a cannon; while they appear to need a shot or two in the mouth to wake them up, once they’re woken up they come barrelling down on their opponents like an avalanche at all three phases of the game; their offense is overwhelming, their defense is crushing and fast, and their goaltending is a conundrum. The worst part for the other three teams is that dragging them into a slog isn’t even a detriment to them. They can go play a grind-out game if they want to, they can sit on leads and make them next to unassailable if they want to, and then they can turn the goals machine right back on. It really is just that easy for them.
Any team that actually finds a way to beat them will be dragonslayers.
2. Canada – Stuck in the Twilight Zone
So!
Canada.
You’re down there with the Scandinavian states after two games; one that’s seemingly incapable of ever really moving on from being mentally silver or bronze medal, and the other one struggling to ice a hockey team thanks to injury ripping through the team like an 80’s slasher villain.
Care to explain what’s going on here, boys?
Okay, part of it is that they lost Cale Makar just before the US decided to mug three of their players within the first 5 minutes of a game. That pretty badly exposed that the Red and White’s defense is a little thinner than maybe we were led to believe, and that didn’t exactly bode well for a team choosing willingly to play Jordan Binnington after he finished his first game with an .885 SV%, and only marginally improved in his game against the US.
What should be scaring the crap out of Canadians however, is just how completely their offense was shut down by the US; everyone who isn’t Connor McDavid went cold at the worst possible time; allowing the Yanks to sit back and dare Canada, Canada, to score on them. Even worse? It worked. That game should’ve gone to Overtime were it not for the fact that their entire offense completely short-circuited with McDavid and Crosby off the ice. They didn’t like playing Brad Marchand, so they didn’t play him as much. There were plenty of other perfectly talented players who could’ve, and maybe even should’ve scored against the
Maybe a bigger problem Canada faces is that “Best on Best” requires everyone to agree on who the best is, and whether or not it fits what they want to do as a system. For their sakes, I hope they rebound big against Finland, because otherwise the referendum on this team is going to be long and very uncomfortable.
3. Finland – The Ultimate Stumbling Block
By contrast, Finland, a team nobody had any real hope for, has the chance to do the single funniest thing ever this morning.
Leijonat put a deep hurt on their brother nation to the point of calling themselves big brother after an overtime winner against Tre Kronor. Even if Finland’s roster is as thin as pond ice in april, they still have come into this tournament guns a-blazing and determined to ruin someone’s day.
Much of this leads up now to today’s game against Canada. Against all odds, Team Canada should absolutely blast Finland out of the water. They should be punching their ticket to a rematch against the United States, and we should all be going “Well, Finland didn’t have a complete roster and injuries and all that”.
Which is what Finland loves. They adore that level of being counted out. It fuels a level of spite that only very few teams get to enjoy.
I expect nothing of them, and I am always overjoyed to see them overcome that. They’ve ended up being pretty fun.
Let’s see if they can do one last really funny thing before their day of sacrifice.
4. Sweden – Jobber to the Stars
Here is a list of what every good international hockey tournament should have, at least in my opinion:
- Two major favorites
- One Dark horse team with a backbreaking critical flaw that will come up in the Quarterfinals
- One Country we all kind of agree we don’t like and make passive-aggressive jokes about
- One insanely likeable but ultimately unsuccessful team that beats a favorite once.
- The Fundamentals team that does nothing exciting but otherwise
- One team that is destined to be a particularly interesting smear on the pavement
- Bizarre but welcome intrusion by a baltic state
- Jobber to the Stars; insanely likeable, very fun team who loses but makes for a great game no matter who they’re playing.
With such a truncated tournament, each team has sort of had to wear multiple hats taken off this list. While you can argue who’s wearing what and when and if they’re starting to stack hats, Sweden made the bold and in my opinion correct choice to take the Jobber to the Stars hat and staple it to their scalps. It does not matter who they are from now on. They are the ultimate fun multiplier; just good enough to get a lot of offense in, just good enough to make all the goals you get from them be completely earned, and their goalies are good enough that you have to work hard to actively beat them.
Now, does that mean that if you’re a Sweden fan you have to enjoy any of this? Absolutely not. This has been a nightmarish tournament for a team that by all accounts should’ve already had at least one win. But I’ve enjoyed every single game Sweden has been in this tourney, and if they can make the US sweat, then that’s even better.
Today’s Games:
- Finland vs. Canada – 10am PST – TNT, TRUtv, MAX
- USA vs. Sweden – 5pm PST – TNT, TRUtv, MAX
So! Who do you think is going to end up in the Championship game?