I do not have some twee thing to write about the Arizona Coyotes. They suck out loud.
They are catastrophically bad at everything. Goal-scoring, shot attempting, penalty killing, power playing. Defending, goaltending. You name it? They’re probably bottom 5 in the league. They have yet to win a single game.
And that’s exactly what they want right now.
After a few years (hell, almost coming up on three decades) of ownership struggles and cap constraints, the Yotes have something resembling a stable structure of power in place...but also had a lot of players they realistically couldn’t hang onto while also trying to be competitive. They had Darcy Kuemper, but Kuemper was too good for the players they were trotting out. So they tore it down to the studs. Every last bit had to go. If you put a gun to my head and told me to name three current Coyotes roster members, I’m not confident I’d be able to come up with a third one to save my life.
Given exceptional status to play in Junior early, had an unreal rookie season and is already well on his way to some goofy number of OHL points, he is the hope being sold to the residents of the Salt River Valley’s hockey community, which is better than you think...
...It’s just not in Glendale. It’s over in Tempe.
So until draft day of 2022 rolls in, the Coyotes will be getting their ass kicked every step of the way. As a not-Coyotes team, it’s up to the Kraken to keep that uninterrupted series of ass-kickings rolling.
Question of the thread! Can you name three players who are or have been on the Coyotes?